When my brother Jay was born, I wanted my mother to pierce his ear. I thought pierced ears on boys were cute.

“That is so nineties. No,” she said.

At that moment, I decided pierced ears on boys were not cute. I believe even more so that pierced ears on men indicate too much youth. That and face tattoos.

I thought about piercing Ellis’ ear but his face is way too immaculate to add anything to it. That’s just my opinion though. When he’s eighteen and if he has the money, he could pierce, tattoo, and genetically alter whatever he wants.

My dad had his ears pierced in the nineties. This was post-divorce. Of course my sisters and I had our ears pierced too. They tell you to twist your earrings in the morning and in the night and dab it with the two-liter solution they give you. Well, we didn’t do that. Rachel was the last to get her ears pierced. Before the piercings healed, we had her across our lap sticking her with all the pretty earrings one could buy from Claire’s.

Since we spent a lot of time home alone while our mother worked, we had the liberty to do so. Some nights we went to sleep without the earrings in and so the holes would close. The next chance we got, we’d get an ice cube and a safety pin and lay each other across our lap again. Four little girls with the door locked playing with sharp objects near their faces. What were we thinking?

Well Rebekah developed an infection. She had to have surgery in seventh grade to remove the keloid. Kids are so crazy, man.